New York State of Mind

Last night was the stag-party, and what a night it was! Jared and Lenny (and all others involved in the planning) did a spectacular job! I won't go into the lurid details, but I shall give you all a little breakdown of what went down:

1) We started off at Bruce's hotel room at 48th and 8th at 4:30pm. Brucey brought some John Smith's ale down from Canada, god bless that man. John Smith's is a beer that most of us Americans got addicted to over in the UK, and it isn't distributed in the US! GRRRRRRRRRR! But anyway, we drank some beers, some vodka, some Jack Daniels....etc. Matthias brought some Ouzo, but oddly enough, noone touched that!!! There were some naked-lady cards that I was told afterwards we were supposed to play a card game with, but we were too busy looking at the 1970's nudey photos. Ahhhhhh how it brought me back to my childhood days.......

2) Around 6ish, a knock at the front door revealed some stunad guy with a mullet and two ladies that looked curiously like strippers....now what on earth could they have been doing there?!?!? Well, suffice it to say that if it looks like a stripper and smells like a stripper.......it is a stripper. So.........2 girlies, 12 guys....GOOD times. I will let your imagination do the rest, but let me leave you with the images of my shirt and belt being removed, and us getting our asses beat with my belt by 2 naked chicks. Like I said......GOOD times.

3) After the lovely young ladies left, we carried on drinking for a while longer. At this point, the room was starting to spin (at least to me it was), so I decided I needed to slow down if I was going to make it throught the night without vomitting or passing out. At 7:45pm, we headed out for dinner.

4) 8pm, Carmine's - a popular Italian restaurant on 44th and 8th. We sat down, Jared ordered enough food for 25 people, and we did some damage. Luckily they brought out lots of bread, which i was eating rapidly to try to get some of the ingested alcohol soaked up. Then, Andy decides to play "Mexican Wave" where everyone has to stand up and pound a glass of wine. Well, stupid me drains 2 glasses in 30 seconds. After this, the room really went hazy and blurry, and I thought I was a goner. Well, luckily I had all that bread on board, so by the time dinner was done, my vision returned. The meal was AWESOME, pretty much any italian dish you could ask for, all served family style, and some tiramisu to top it all off. YUM.

5) 9pm - Next, we were off to ESPN Zone - a huge sports bar on 42nd and Broadway. Here, they have tons of video games and huge screen TV's, etc. It is like heaven on earth. Anyway, we continued the drinking (at this point everyone was so full, that not much drinking happened) and played some video games. We then decided that we were having a distinct lack of boobies and needed to head to the tittie-bar.

6) 11pm, Flashdancer's Gentlemen's Club, 53rd and Broadway. Many hot broads crawling all over the place, very nice eye candy. We stayed for an hour or so, until everyone got fed up with being solicited for lap dances LITERALLY every 30 seconds. And then Nate decided to break a beer bottle and slash his finger open. I offered to suture it closed for him, but he declined. Oh well, enjoy the scar brutha.

7) 12:10am, Some karaoke bar (I don't remember the name!) down on 53rd and 2nd-3rd. At this point, we had been partying for 8 hours, and my old age was starting to catch up with me. I could barely walk anymore I was so wiped out! I hung around for an hour or so, didn't do any singing as I couldn't get up the energy to do so, then decided to call it a night. Myself, Lenny and Mark wandered back to Penn Station, and took a 1:46am train home. My lovely fiancee picked us up at the station, drove the boys back to Long Beach, and then we went back home and were in bed by 3:30am.

So, to sum up, it was the best fucking bachelor party I could have ever asked for. I was surrounded by the best friends a guy could have, the whole thing was organized so well and went so smoothly, it was truly incredible. I need to thank everyone for coming, so THANK YOU to all my homies, for the best night ever. Lenny, Mark (Koomo), Brucey, Matt (Ganja Weed hea), Nate, Nathaniel, Roberto, Andy, Gaz, and most of all, Jared - you are the best fucking best man a playa like me could ask for. Thanks so much for everything dude.

With that, I shall love and leave thee, as I need to sleep more before I go back into the city tonight for Round 2 - the SUPER BOWL!

Let's Go EAGLES!!!

-B